2. "Cry to the bus driver. Sit behind the driver. When the bus stops, get off and run as fast as you can from the bully!" That type of behavior is demeaning and only encourages the bully.
1. Obviously, the father knew his son was capable of doing what I accused him of doing. Would I have gone to the trouble of asking the father to do something, if it were not true? Perhaps, the boy had seen his father, brother or other relatives act in such a manner.
1. My Depression Era, WW2 veteran, uncle Bill's answer would have been, "You stand up to him, punch him in the nose, draw blood, kick him in the leg. Beat him up!" Remember, the boy is bigger than my son. That type of behavior could lead to either boy being injured, or expelled from school. Had the fight happened on the bus, the driver might lose control and wreck the bus.
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Let's analyze this situation.
That evening, after supper (dinner to you Yankees) he and I went to the home of the boy. The boy answered the door, saw Jonathan and me, and promptly turned ashen. I asked to speak to the boy's daddy. After introducing myself, and shaking and the man's hand, I told him the following. "According to my son, your son is picking on him, poking and punching him on the arm and chest. My son is no sissy (That's an old term meaning scared to fight.) As you can see, my boy is younger and much smaller than your son. I am sure that you, like me, can see this mismatch in size isn't fair. Plus, with all the shoving back and forth, the driver might become distracted, lose control and wreck the bus. Children, perhaps even your son or mine, could be injured or even killed. I'm asking that you talk to your son about this."
When he was about 12 or so, our very skinny and quiet son told me, "Daddy, there is a boy on the bus who picks on me. I don't do anything to deserve this. I avoid even looking at him. Plus, he's bigger than me." I had 3 answers to offer, but only one would work.
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We raised our two children, Rachel and Jonathan, to come to us with any question and any issue that arose in their life. NOTHING was off the table. There was NO subject that was taboo or not to be discussed. Dad knows all the answers and can solve just about everything that comes up.
The dad's response was priceless. As he looked down at his very sheepish and scared son, "Mr. Greene, I can guarantee you that my son will never touch your son again." Whatever the dad did, it worked! The boy never even LOOKED at Jonathan again.
My boy will be 42 in one week, has three redheaded boys, all of whom worship their dad and their granddad, whom they call "Greene." They call their grandmother, "Ruby," which is her first name. They also know they can ask their dad, mom and grandparents any question. Just the other day, Hank, the 11 year old asked ...
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3. "Son, if you know where the bully lives, Daddy will handle this."
2. I did not threaten to do anything to the boy or to his father. That's stupid and would only escalate the situation. I didn't even mention the school officials or law enforcement.
3. The father immediately saw the seriousness and danger our sons shoving each other around posed to the safe operation of the bus. Only an idiot would encourage such behavior!
Hi everybody! I have been looking at posts on narcs and narc abuse on here and if has really helped me out a lot. I am currently struggling with my situation and need some advice/support.
I met a narc last year, everything seemed to good to be true. Love bombing, always texting calling and taking me on dates. Everything changed when someone warned me about him out in public in front of him and who he is. This caused a conflict with us and the love bombing seized.
he would tell me that everything is okay and i can come and talk. He would set a time limit on me and kick me out after that.
he would then text me like everything was fine and we hung out again and after that he completely ghosted me for one week. He came back and texted me a week later laughing about the ghosting and acting like nothing had happened.
he continued to text me ( not like in the beginning) make plans with me, then on the day of the plans he would just ghost me. One day he would act interested the next silence.
i contacted him a month later and he acted like nothing happened. He was on a vacation and sent me a picture of another woman ( someone he allegedly met on the trip) to strike a reaction but i never gave him one. After the trip he came to my place and was extremely rude, accusing me of going on dates with a bunch of men. The next day he accused me of being an alcoholic and that he wanted nothing to do with me but said well maybe we can be "friends" then ghosted me
i assumed at this point it was over and i would never hear from him again. He contacted me on the holiday a month later acting like everything was great. We ended up hanging out a month or so later and when we hung out it went well, i thought things were going in the right direction.
after we hung out.. silence. I would try to text him and if he replied it would be very short then he just stopped replying. He ghosted me for almost three months. I thought he was done this time and of course he popped up again like nothing happened. At this point i was getting sick of if so i questioned him as to why he dissapeared and always does this. Of course he had some sob story about a injury and family member dying of cancer. I felt pity for him and he gave me an apology.. so i took him back stupidly.
things seemed to be going smooth for a couple months, of course until his family member died and his injury got better he never contacted me and was distant. Menawhile, i was there for him during the difficult time for him. He lied to me about the funeral and never wanted to chat. I was chasing him and he would always claim nothing was wrong but when i said i thought he used me when he was down he could not handle it and would always tell me he didnt care and to go away. I would get so upset i would try texting him to work it out he would barelt respond and if he did he would not be nice about it.
we did hang out a couple times after that, he would ignore me after. One day i was like hey i think you are seeing someone else, and i was like well ixam seeing someone so no problem if you are he said " buy bye good luck with your new guy stop contacting me" i was devastated and tried to get into contact with him for weeks then i just gave up and accepted it was over. He ended up contacting me a month later acting like everything was fine. He wanted to go out and have drinks i told him i would. He and i both seemed to have a great time. He ends up ignoring me again. I kept texting him trying to figure out what was wrong. He kept saying everything was fine and i said ok can we hang out again? He said maybe i was like why? He just kept saying maybe …
our last conversation we had… i said what is wrong ? He said nothing is wrong everything is fine. I asked him why he keeps saying maybe. He said " maybe but i dont want to see you right now" i said why? He saix " im just not feeling it, if i wanted to date i would" i said why did you contact me less then a week ago wanting to go out? He said i didnt.. even though he did. So i said should i just move on or what? He said whatever you want to do. So i said that he was really confusing me and asked him if he had anything more to say before i move on? My messages were turning green so i panicked he blocked me and reacted irrationally. I said " omg did you block me? My messages are not going through. Even texted him on my work phone asking what was up. And called him twice ( please dont judge me i know it is pathetic i never was this type of girl before him) so he replied and said " Ok I'll block you now" then immedietly blocked me. He has never blocked me before since I have met him he will just ghost. Is this ths final discard aka " grand finale? Did i just push him too far?
this has upset me so much its hard to even function.
